41 Lbs down

Well, I have reached the 40 lb mark, THANK GOD lol...I have been threw a lot so far in this lap band journey of mine. I am really proud of myself for doing this so far but I can't help but feel like I haven't really gotten anywhere. I know some of my clothes are pretty much falling off me but I still feel like I see the same size person. Don't get me wrong I do feel better but i know that I am nowhere near done. I have about 100 more lbs to go until my Doctors goal weight. Sometimes I think i'm against myself, my mind plays tricks on me. Like I look at my plate and I know its a very small portion but because I have gotten so used to eating that size my eyes think it looks too big. Like I always convince myself that I ate too much, ugh lol who knows. I am so paranoid that I am stretching out my little pouch but from what I hear that is very hard to do. Having this band in my body has changed some things, but its my brain that continues to work against me. I could eat and because im bored I want to eat...of course I don't but just the thought makes me ashamed of myself.